I’m often jealous of previous generations.  Not just because they got to eat bread without feeling guilty, but for the lack of options they enjoyed.  Don’t get me wrong, having no options isn’t fun, but having so many options your circuits get overloaded isn’t much fun either.

No matter what we’re doing, we have so many options that we can’t possibly try them all.  How do we know we’re choosing the right entertainment?  Blizzard flavor? Nigerian prince to send our money to? How do we know we’re not missing out?!

The fear of missing out makes having too many options stressful, rather than freeing, because we’re continually worried we’ll choose wrong.  From little decisions like What if I pick the wrong Netflix movie, to huge decisions like What if I pick the wrong Netflix series, we’re overloaded and stressed out with too many options at every turn in our lives.

Back before Netflix and huge cable packages people didn’t have to worry about what to watch.  You only had a few options to choose from so you’d pick the one that interested you the most.  Your older brother would let you know what you wanted by saying things like, “I want to watch Gilligan’s Island, so do you.”  Those were simple times.  Now we figuratively have a literal endless amount of entertainment options.  It’s overwhelming.

We have to decide whether we want to watch Netflix, Hulu, Amazon Prime, an old DVD, or cable AND THEN we can begin our search.

Somewhere way down on the list is turning off our TV and doing something else.  There’s no time for anything else.  There’s already too many shows to watch.

Choices give us freedom, but that freedom opens up a well of anxiety inside us.

Have you ever been in a situation where you suddenly didn’t have options?  Maybe you were on vacation to a cabin in the woods that didn’t have internet access.  Your choices for entertainment were two board games and a couple old VHS John Candy movies.  You’d likely feel more relaxed and content with your choice, whether you opted for Uncle Buck or Monopoly, than you normally do when you have endless options.

When we have literally hundreds of things we can pick, it’s overwhelming to our senses. We can never really answer that question of, “Is this the BEST choice?”

When our options are limited we can relax.  When you’re in the cabin watching Uncle Buck you’re not thinking about how you could be scrolling Netflix for that perfect series.  You’re content to give your attention fully to the only entertainment choice in front of you.

In the New Year I want to slow the pace of life down and feel more relaxed.  I long to go back to the time when people lived in the moment, when they only had a few choices and they were ok with that.

Vanilla Ice Cream and Three Channels

I never buy vanilla ice cream at the store.  There are so many ice cream flavors that buying vanilla feels like purposefully watching a black and white TV.  Oddly enough, the most satisfied I’ve ever been with a bowl of ice cream is when I’d visit my grandparents house and the only option was vanilla.  I found I’d enjoy that vanilla ice cream much more than I’d enjoy ice cream when I’m able to choose from a myriad of options.

It’s not that I just love vanilla ice cream, either.  Sometimes my grandparents wouldn’t have vanilla, they’d have chocolate or butter pecan.  No matter what flavor they had, when it was the only option, I felt satisfied. I found my enjoyment for it wasn’t clouded with a low-grade anxiety wondering if I’d made the right flavor choice.

Netflix is great, but there’s a peace that comes from growing up with only a few channels.  When I was little we didn’t have cable.  Not only did we have an easier choice in what to watch, we had an easier time of just walking away.  When you have three channels, and none of them are playing anything you want to watch, it’s easy to turn the TV off and go do something else.

Options are Up But Productivity is Down

Have you found yourself just scrolling through social media on your phone, or scrolling through title after title on Netflix?  Why don’t we just walk away more often and go do something productive?

It’s harder to walk away because you can never scroll through all the possible options.  If I just search a little longer maybe that perfect show will jump out to me.  When you only have three channels, it doesn’t take long to exhaust your options.

I often fantasize about going back to a flip phone.  I hate how addicted I am to my phone, but several of the apps on it are a life saver.  Without a smart phone I’d be forced to listen to the radio, and I get a lot of value and joy out of podcasts.  It takes a wasted time, like my commute, and turns it into a productive time.

Google Maps is also pretty handy on account of my directional skills being on par with a milk-drunk toddler.  I also have to be able to check my work email while I’m out on job sites, because sometimes we’re waiting on time sensitive documents to go through before we can close.  Documents that say things like, “Yup, these people paid for the house.”

If I could find ways around those issues and still do my 9 to 5 job with a flip phone I’d switch today.  And, I’d immediately regret it, because I love my stupid pocket computer.  It feels like the solution is to just have more willpower and only use my phone for good.  But, that doesn’t sound like me.

Taking the Plunge and Making a Change

I took the heroic step and deleted social media from my phone. Ok, I took the slightly less heroic step of putting all my social media icons into a little folder, but not actually deleting them.  It’s a step.

I have a romanticized longing for the days of no entertainment- days where you spent more time visiting, practicing an instrument, or just watching whatever is going on outside your window.

I think we’re giving up a lot for this modern life.  I’m not convinced all this technology is actually making us any happier.  How many hours per day does your dog spend on social media?  Which one of you is happier? I rest my case.

I’m going to do something about it in my life.  I want to use technology as a tool, not a crutch.  I want to be ok with being bored.  Remember daydreaming?  Adults don’t daydream or pretend.  I want to waste time daydreaming instead of wasting it by mindlessly scrolling through my news feed.

I want vanilla ice cream and I want to not have fomo while I’m eating it, damnit.

Instead of just being jealous of previous generations, let’s join them.  If technology isn’t making you happy, get rid of it.  Find what reasons you have for owning a smart phone and use it for that.  Use it for work related activities, and calling your mother.  Not for fun and games!

Let’s not give our lives away to that little black mirror of endless possibilities.  Take back your precious time from the clutches of Netflix, Hulu and Amazon Prime. Forego the shackles of endless social media scrolling.

Let’s buy vintage 400 pound TVs with only three channels. Let’s stare blankly out the window like the new kid in town who no one will play with, but in a less depressing way.  Let’s play tag with unsuspecting strangers in crowded public areas.  I mean, right?  Let’s purposefully give ourselves less options to combat option overload.  Take back your life and actually live it.  Who’s with…Hold on…sorry, I got a notification.  Ahhh Mom heart emoji’s my picture of Baby Burrito Bowl.  #totesadorbs.

…me!

Guys?  Hello…guys?

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Using Selective Attention to Increase Life Satisfaction