We’ve all been there.  It’s lunchtime around the ol’ office and everyone is grabbing their coats and top hats, or whatever.  They’ve got to move quickly, like a herd of time-compressed sheep, because the lunch break is only so long.  They rush out into the cold world to give away much of their hard-earned profit for an overpriced lunch they’ll shove down their throats with hardly a second to taste.

Not you.  You’re on a different plan.  You want to be financially free, frolicking on a beach, while your coworkers are still grabbing their top hats for their daily mid-work food purchasing extravaganza.  It’s only a few bucks so they don’t bother to pack a lunch.  You’re not a walking cliche so you pack your own lunch. You savvy son of a…

Packing your own lunch saves anywhere from $7, if the alternative is a fast food meal, to over $20, if you felt like really cutting into your profit margin and going to a restaurant.

You reach down into your lunch box and pull out a delicious…Oh no..it can’t be.

You’ve forgotten to pack a lunch. Damn.  Suddenly the visions of beaches disappear as Tupac Changes becomes the soundtrack to your life.  You see a vision of an old soul hunched over in the corner, still typing away on those TPS reports.  It’s you.  You’re the geriatric.  You can’t afford to retire because you didn’t pack your lunch that one time.

You’re inconsolable, slumped over your desk in pity for your future self.  Suddenly the ghost of future independence sponsored by Burrito Bowl Diaries eerily comes into view.   He’s stunning in his elegance.  He munches on a burrito as his fleece bathrobe flutters in the breeze.

“Don’t lose hope, bro.” The Burrito Bowl Ghost says.  “I have experienced this very predicament and have found a way to overcome.  When I find myself hungry, with no packed lunch within my arms reach, I head to the great diner known as Taco Bell.”

“Oh my god.  A ghost,” you say arrogantly.

The ghost takes another bite .

“What about Subway? Subway has sandwiches.  That’s healthier.”-You, arguing with a ghost.

“Great question,” Burrito Bowl Ghost replies. “First of all, a foot-long Subway sandwich is sure to cost over $5.  How much disposable income do you have?!”

“There’s no way to eat a meal for less than that.  Are you wearing a bathrobe?” you meekly respond.

Without addressing your concern the Burrito Bowl sponsored ghost resumes, “Secondly, Subway isn’t actually a bad option if you feel like spending around six bucks.  Bread isn’t super healthy for you and neither are processed meats but when compared to a hamburger, Subway is a pretty decent option.  I don’t go for Subway, but that’s because I’m not a millionaire.”

You glance over at the clock.  Your lunch break is only so long and this ghost doesn’t seem to be on any time constraints. He is a ghost though, which is cool.

“Instead,” the ghost continues, “I go to Taco Bell and cast mine eyes upon their endless $1 Menu.  I always get the same thing, partly because I may have misused the word ‘endless’, and partly because I’ve found my jam.”

You stand up and grab your coat, “I really do need to get…”

The Burrito Bowl Ghost interrupts you as he pulls out his phone and shows you his instagram.

“I always order 1) The spicy potato soft taco (230 calories) and 2) The cheesy bean and rice burrito (440 calories). Grand total for my lunch, $2.”

His ghostly fingers scroll through various smoothies and the occasional burrito bowl until he finds an unremarkable picture of two Taco Bell burritos.

“Very nice,” you reply trying not to be rude because he’s a ghost and who knows what maleficent intentions he’s capable of.

“Toaster filter is the key,” he responds.

“Sometimes on a Friday, if it’s right after payday, I might spring for a second cheesy bean and rice burrito, inflating my total to $3, but I try not to make a habit of it.”

“That’s all you eat?” you respond, “No wonder you’re a ghost.”

“Ha, funny. I died unrelated to Taco Bell.  I’ll admit this isn’t the healthiest quick meal but it does the trick. Want to know why I choose this particular meal?”

“Can we talk and walk?” you ask as you wrap a red scarf around your neck.

The red scarf has small green dots all over it in a haphazard pattern.   Upon closer examination the green dotes are actually tiny green monsters with tiny red hats on them.  They're Christmas monsters. The monsters are so small you mistook them at first for ordinary green dots.  The joy of seeing the dots were actually monsters gave you a chuckle.  That's why you bought the scarf to begin with.  You had hoped Carol, in accounting, would have noticed them and said something to you. She never did though. The scarf is itchy and Carol doesn't even work their anymore.  You're not sure why you still wear the scarf.  The scarf doesn't matter.

“First, it’s Cheap,” the Burrito Bowl sponsored ghost says as he sits down in the chair across the desk from you.  “Secondly, there’s no meat.  I’m not a vegetarian by any stretch of the imagination but fast food meat makes me feel icky and the odds of food poisoning go up dramatically.”

“That’s a solid point,” you concede as you sit back down.

“Three,” the ghost holds up his thumb and two additional fingers like he’s British, “two burritos have enough calories to keep me satiated.  This meal is between 600-1000 calories depending on whether I shell out for the second cheesy bean and rice burrito. Sometimes I get two cheesy bean and rice burritos and zero of the spicy potato soft tacos.  I do that if I’m real hungry but only want to spend two dollars.”

“How many calories does a ghost even…” you’re interrupted.

“Four, It’s healthier than other fast food alternatives.   Most of the actual substance in this order is of the beans, potatoes and rice variety. This is a much better option than getting most of your calories from the buns of a fast food hamburger.”

You don’t bother a reply.

“Five, Taco Bell’s are abundant.  It wouldn’t be a very good money saving tip if I advocated going to some obscure restaurant only available in a particular area.”

Your deadened eyes no longer blink as you listen listlessly.

“Oh, I almost forgot,” the Burrito Bowl sponsored ghost pulls out two wrapped burritos from his bag and slides them across the desk. “These are for you.”

Your eyes light up with the unending joy that only a Taco Bell dollar menu item can provide.

He leans back in the office chair and continues his lecture, handing you an additional hot sauce every few seconds.

“Make no mistake I’m not advocating you start going to Taco Bell everyday in lieu of packing a lunch.  I am, however, advocating for going to Taco Bell if you find yourself in a pinch and don’t want to waste $10 on a fast food meal that will leave you sad and bloated.”

You eat your burritos as the ghostly figure switches topics to the difference between Roth IRAs and Traditional IRAs.

You aren’t really listening to how Roth IRAs are after tax and Traditional IRAs are before tax because the delicious cheesy beans and rice burrito is too good to concentrate on anything else.

The office door clicks as your coworkers start to drip back in.

You never noticed before but they all look  bloated and tired.  They had each bought themselves an expensive lunch because they work hard and they’ve earned it.  No one was any happier, though.  They were sad, more lethargic and poorer than they were less than an hour ago.

“Time for me to go,” the awesome ghost who brought you a free lunch says as he vanishes before your eyes.

“Taco Bell, huh?” your coworker mumbles as he gives you the finger guns and sits back down. “Applebees is doing 2 for $20.  I ate them both. I feel sick. LOL.”

“I feel great.  I think I’m going to workout after work,” you say heroically.

Your coworker didn’t hear you.  His eyes are glazed over as he settles back into his TPS report.

Out the window you see a ghost riding a longboard down the sidewalk, bathrobe fluttering in the wind.

Disclaimer: I am not paid by Taco Bell, yet. 

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Here’s a couple articles I think you’ll find more worthwhile than this one.

1. Ten Years From Now You May as Well Be Ten Years Ahead
2. The Snowball Effect of Life Optimization
3. 11 Smart Ways to Lower Your Grocery Bill and Eat Healthier